This short article addresses some of the common questions that many Catholic couples have about Natural Family Planning (NFP). I am a nurse studying to become a certified provider for the SymptoPro Method of Natural Family Planning to serve our Diocese. —Michele Grantham RN
What is NFP?
NFP is a method for managing your fertility and planning your family, for both size and spacing.
It is a set of physical observations that are charted each month which you interpret according to the scientific information we know about the human body and the reproductive system. A woman charts these observations which allows her to identify when she is most fertile, relatively fertile, and when she is not fertile. People may have heard about methods such as the Ovulation Method or the Symptopro method.
What is the difference between NFP and Contraception?
Firstly, let’s look at the purpose of both of these options. NFP is based upon a couple’s fertility. The idea is to identify the woman’s most fertile time using natural and observable signs. This is a tool kit which helps a couple then plan their family, to space children, or avoid pregnancy if there is a good reason. So, there are three purposes of NFP: to have children, to space children and to avoid pregnancy during certain times.
The purpose of Artificial contraception is always to avoid pregnancy. Chemical artificial contraception is basically the loading of hormones in the body to overwhelm the natural reproductive system and prevent it from functioning normally. Barrier methods interrupt the sexual act and then there are other products that actually have a possible abortifacient property by making the womb inhospitable to implantation.
Natural Family planning is natural and works with a woman’s cycle no matter what her reproductive age or purpose might be. Each woman is unique, and her cycle is unique to her. The signs and symptoms of her cycle can be used to interpret her fertility and then help the couple plan their family naturally. Her cycle may have different characteristics during different times, such as while breastfeeding or the premenopausal period. NFP is sensitive to this and allows a woman to know her fertility during these reproductive phases of her life.
What is the effectiveness of NFP?
Effectiveness has two categories. One is method effectiveness, and the other is actual effectiveness. Method effectiveness is when the birth control or the natural family planning method is used perfectly. NFP, when used properly, has a method effectiveness of 96-98%. Some of the artificial methods of birth control have a high method effectiveness also. But when any method is not used properly, or consistently, the effectiveness decreases. This is called the actual effectiveness. All methods of birth control decrease with failure to adhere to the rules.
Is NFP complicated to learn?
At first NFP can seem like a lot to learn. In the classes we first learn about the reproductive systems of the man and woman and how they relate to each other. There are rules that teach couples to time intercourse depending on their goal of either achieving pregnancy or avoiding it. A woman learns how to read the signs and symptoms of her own menstrual cycle and interpret them. In the Sympto-Pro method that I will teach, we take three months of charting the woman’s signs and practice interpreting them. This eventually becomes routine the more you chart.
An important factor in this process is for the man and woman to both be involved in learning the method. Success of NFP is best when both people understand the method and work together.
Does NFP spoil romantic spontaneity?
Lovemaking is both unitive and procreative. By unitive, I mean it is the most intimate sharing between a husband and wife. At the same time, the act itself is creative and biologic, that is procreative— cooperating with God to create new human life. With every act of sex, there is a possibility of the creation of life. This is even true with artificial birth control as many couples will attest that human error often leads to contraceptive failure.
When the goal is to avoid pregnancy NFP requires some periods of sexual abstinence during the most fertile time of a woman’s cycle. Periodic abstinence is not a negative. It can actually promote intimacy. Building up anticipation for lovemaking creates romance because it is not taken for granted but anticipated. There are usually plenty of days when a couple is not fertile during each cycle. It may take some adjusting in the schedule of your lives to build in that spontaneity based on your fertility cycle.
It is important to remember that lovemaking is an expression of love. It is an action that expresses love and not just an instinctual drive. And what is the definition of Love? St. Thomas Aquinas defines love as “willing the best for the other as other”. Well, what does that mean? It means that we chose what is best for the other without self-regard. It means putting the other first before our own desires for sexual satisfaction. The discipline in NFP helps us to choose the good for the other and for the marriage. If your goal as a couple at the time is to avoid pregnancy, then it makes sense to abstain during your most fertile period so that you do not conceive. This may be best for your partner’s well-being or family life issues for a period of time. Lovemaking is not just about our sexual satisfaction from the other.
What are some of the advantages of NFP?
I think one of the most important advantages of NFP is that it is natural. The problem with artificial birth control is that it overwhelms the natural reproductive system. Often there are side effects to using hormonal birth control such as weight gain, irritability, depression, even some cardiac side effects. Other methods such as the IUD irritate the uterine wall and can damage it. With most of these artificial methods, a woman can return to her natural cycle when she decides to have a baby. However, there is sometimes a delay since her body needs time to heal and readjust.
Another advantage of NFP is the involvement of both the man and woman. NFP requires that the man pay attention to the woman’s cycle so that he understands their chosen actions and the consequences. This is not just the woman’s responsibility, but that of the couples. NFP helps to promote intimate communication between the couple. It requires some sacrifice for each other. And finally, it builds up their marriage through the practice of fidelity while abstinent. They have to wait for each other. Building up the virtues of patience and fidelity is valuable to the relationship and contributes to a long and successful marriage.
One advantage of using NFP is that you can identify problems with your fertility early and start to address them. For example, some couples may have trouble conceiving children for various reasons. They can use NFP to help pinpoint their most fertile period and target their lovemaking. When a couple have not been able to conceive after six months of active trying in this manner, we encourage them to get more help, usually with their doctors. Sometimes charting a woman’s signs might indicate that she is not ovulating or that there are other issues that need medical consultation.
Most artificial birth control may allow more days of intercourse, but it is usually up to the woman to be compliant in taking a medication. This does not require understanding or conversations between the couple. Except for some barrier methods and sterilization, the burden of artificial fertility control is usually on the woman
What if the man is not interested or does not attend the NFP classes?
In order for NFP to be very effective, it does require that both the man and the woman partake in the method. A woman can chart her signs and report to the man when she is most likely fertile or in her non-fertile period of her cycle. And during very busy times of your life this may be how it goes especially after it becomes more routine part of your life. However, at first, I think it is important that both partners learn the method and take an interest.
There are couples who are not so comfortable talking about this aspect of their relationship. Sometimes they think it takes away from the romance. Sometimes people are not comfortable talking about their sexuality. Sometimes they think they want lots of kids and it does not matter. Or the opposite is true, that they think they do not want kids and so they start using artificial birth control.
It is important for couples to talk to each other about their sexuality or conjugal life. When couples attend a NFP class, it promotes this discussion between them. This is an important advantage to taking the NFP class. Many marriages fail because there was little communication about this most intimate of expressions between the man and woman. NFP helps to improve conversation, knowledge and understanding. I hope to be starting some classes using the Symptopro method here in the Tucson Diocese.
Isn’t NFP a Catholic Birth Control method?
NFP is a fertility acceptance method of family planning. It is true that some people can use NFP to avoid ever having children. NFP is not the same as artificial contraception because the couple is accepting their natural biological rhythms. They must conduct themselves with personal self-control which involves loving the person versus using them for the pleasure of sexual satisfaction without any recognition of the potential of the procreative dimension of sex. To practice NFP requires some sacrifice and abstinence. It involves conversation, intimacy, knowledge, and the promise of fidelity.
Why is NFP important to our faith?
Our faith teaches us how to live authentic love. Lovemaking is about expressing authentic love to another human being. Authentic love has four characteristics: FREE, TOTAL, FAITHFUL and FRUITFUL. FREE means that the couple give themselves freely to each other without manipulation or a prior unfinished commitment. TOTAL means they give their whole selves, body and soul. When a couple really love each other, they respect each other, as they are created. When we say whole self, we mean our natural fertility as well. It is important to note that the use of artificial birth control is a way of holding back from this total self-donation since it is suppressing the very aspect of ourselves that brings us together in the first place- our sexuality or the fact that we are man and woman. Love is FAITHFUL. This means commitment for life. All the decisions made by the couple guard the fidelity of the marriage. And finally, FRUITFULLNESS, which means openness to life and the task of helping your partner get to heaven. NFP allows a couple to live out their lives in authentic love. When a couple give themselves freely in the marital sexual union, it is a sign of love. NFP promotes TOTAL love because there is no chemical or barrier that is masking one’s sexuality. The practice of NFP requires conversation, understanding and sacrifice which build up virtue in the marriage and helps to promote longevity. NFP promotes fruitfulness because it is based on fertility and family formation. This is the same love that Christ showed us while he walked and died on the earth. His love was free, total, faithful and fruitful. He gave His whole self, body and soul and opened up the path to redemption. Our marriages are meant to be a sign of this kind of authentic love. This is why marriage is a Sacrament. A sacrament is a visible sign of an invisible reality. We cannot see LOVE or God. But we are a sign of it. NFP helps us to be the sacrament of Love, of the presence of Christ, on the earth.
Or the easy answer: This is what the Church teaches: Marriage is a covenant between each other and God. We are called to cooperate with God and love each other authentically. We are called to be gift to one another and TOTALLY respect the whole person that God created. NFP is a family planning method that allows us to accept our natural fertility as created.